Normalize mailing Texas lawmakers 7 dildos.

In Texas, owning more dildos than guns is a crime. Probably.

Always love how republicans and conservatives are constantly so preoccupied with sex, sex, sex all the time and in ever more imaginative and obscure ways.

I now associate their religious beliefs to sex, Jesus, sex, guns, sex, the American flag and sex.

What if they’re dildo shaped guns? Would Texas ever dare to ban those?

If they would prevent people and companies to own more than six houses or flazs, that would make way more sense.

Of course it’s possible to own more than 6 assault rifles, right?

“So, what are you in for?”

“Seventh dildo.”

The very people that come up with these pearl clutch laws are the same people who also want to legalize marrying 12 year olds. But won’t anyone think of the children, PLEASE!

Imagine being so unable to pleasure women that you’re jealous and petty against your wife’s dildo collection.

I’m interested in seeing a judicial decision on whether a double ended dildo counts as one dildo or two dildos.

If you create a religion with a dildo being recognized by your dogma as official iconography, could you unlock “unlimited dildos” based upon religious freedom exceptions?

“Compromises the innocence of children”???

Unless you are incredibly liberal parents, children don’t even know what the fuck those are until they’re old enough to recognize it as anything more than just a “tube”. By the time they grasp the idea that it’s something sexual, they’re old enough to handle that knowledge.

“smaller government” apparently just means few dildos for the inspector to have to count.

Exqueeze me? The fuck? Is that real?

Edit: yes. Although it’s mired in legislative gobbledygook:

Sec. 43.23. OBSCENITY. (a) A person commits an offense if, knowing its content and character, he wholesale promotes or possesses with intent to wholesale promote any obscene material or obscene device.

(b) Except as provided by Subsection (h), an offense under Subsection (a) is a state jail felony.

© A person commits an offense if, knowing its content and character, he:

(1) promotes or possesses with intent to promote any obscene material or obscene device; or

(2) produces, presents, or directs an obscene performance or participates in a portion thereof that is obscene or that contributes to its obscenity.

(d) Except as provided by Subsection (h), an offense under Subsection © is a Class A misdemeanor.

(e) A person who promotes or wholesale promotes obscene material or an obscene device or possesses the same with intent to promote or wholesale promote it in the course of his business is presumed to do so with knowledge of its content and character.

(f) A person who possesses six or more obscene devices or identical or similar obscene articles is presumed to possess them with intent to promote the same.

So, women seem to be exempt (“he possesses with intent”) and it is a “performance”. Whatever that means. And it’s a misdemeanor.

But it’s real. Can have six dildos in a performance, but more than six? Oooh that’s a paddlin’.

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Small government, uh?

If they can outlaw a specific store from selling something, they can outlaw any store from selling anything. This isn’t just about sex toys, it’s a test to see what they can get away with.