- cross-posted to:
- shitposting@lemmy.ml
- cross-posted to:
- shitposting@lemmy.ml
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Bidets are amazing. If you don’t have one you should go buy one, they start fairly low priced
Paid $50 for mine like 7 years ago. Is it fancy? Heck no. Does it clean my butt real good? Heck yes.
When I can afford a fancy heated, air drying bidet that will be my goalpost of success.
I started with a $30 cheapo 10 years ago and it was life changing. Last year I got a stupid expensive one. Like, has a night light, auto flush (because I got the matching toilet), auto lid, heated seat, heated water, deodorizer, wireless remote, etc. (Toto S7A)
Just so you’re prepared, the air dry doesn’t fully replace the pat dry entirely unless you’re gonna sit there for a good long time.
That said, I have no regrets.
Just so you’re prepared, the air dry doesn’t fully replace the pat dry entirely unless you’re gonna sit there for a good long time.
I just shake my ass off like a dog coming in out of the rain
You can find a decent one with heated seat/water/fan for not much more than that. I spent a bit over 100$ for mine, and I love it. We had to RMA it within 6 months because the heater died, but it’s been rocking for like 1.5 years since then without issue.
Worth every penny. Especially in the middle of winter.
Why is my ass always itching?
Because you don’t wash it, you dumbass.
🤌
I don’t know about you but I don’t wipe my anus on my face or use it to pick up food. No judgement though.
Me either, but I would still prefer it to be clean.
Bidet with a quiet-close toilet seat 🧑🍳💋
Auto lid, auto flush checking in.
Yes, I’m spoiled.
Wiping like a pleb when you travel and slamming the seat.
An actual shit post lol
I got something like this for like 15 euros from a German shop but I’m sure you’ll find it everywhere. I payed a little extra for stainless-steel instead of plastic. It’s still incredibly cheap and my family uses it daily for years. I don’t need any more luxury.
I think this is better than whats mounted into the toilet, because well sooner or later you get one of those days when shit flies everywhere and then enjoy cleaning the nozzle, meanwhile these things are usually just attached to the side of the toilet pr to the wall and no danger of it getting shit on barring extreme circumstances
Even the cheap ones have a self clean setting. It just sprays water down the nozzle, and is between on and off. Turn it to that for a second and then off. Never had an issue. When I clean the toilet I use the same brush to glance over it, but really it stays clean on its own
Lol, maybe in a shit (pun intended) bidet. Mine is mounted under the toilet seat and self cleans before and after spraying. Also, I can have it set to hit my butthole instead of trying to plains aim and spraying water and shit where it doesn’t need to be.
Plus, mine has heated water, so I don’t feel like I’m gonna get frostbite on my butthole in the dead of winter.
Plastic doesn’t rust, sometimes it’s better. Even better if it let’s you adjust the spray width.
Well you could hire a maid, and they pour toilet bowl cleaner onto it. Even after you told them not to. Now the plastic is eaten away, and you have to replace it.
If it’s tapped directly into the ice cold water line that sounds terrible. Gotta save up and spring for ceramic instant water heating.
This is the kind I have, and I will never not have one again.
Had my first experience of a bidet in Japan but not just that, the toilet seat was heated too, that was my first dump after landing
That’s what I love about mine. Automatic lid raise and lower as you walk in, heated ring and water, (both adjustable temp), air dry, (again heated), and charcoal filtered air filtration to minimize the stench from that drive through burrito.
It’s the posh life. Very nearly the equal to having your own chamberlain.
Humm, I see you enjoy Toto. The king of home Bidets!
God bless the rains down in Africa.
My friend has one of those Japanese ones. It also has a warmed toilet seat. When I came out, I said that seat is amazing and they said people never come out of there. I proposed that they were napping on the seat. Why do seat warmers feel so good? The thing is, I could never figure out how to make the actual bidet part work. I suspect the people who took a long time were also trying to test it out, but didn’t know how. Or maybe they did and enjoyed it?
Japanese toilets are so far beyond what we’re doing anywhere else in the world it’s not even funny
Wtaf have our toilet scientists been doing for the last century in the western world?
Trying to get people to sit the right way on the toliet.
Do people not use the shelf for their comics and snacks?
It’s as easy as using
twothree shells.What’s the third one for
I remember it being a meme, but I couldn’t remember which one. For the uninformed like me: https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/three-seashells
Mom, dad, I’m gay. Also that heated toilet seat is amazing.
Me
So, maybe I’m missing something here, but bidets don’t seem all that great? Everyone on the internet is always proclaiming life changing experiences with these things. However, when I recently used them they don’t seem to do very much. My butthole is still poopy and when I wipe to dry my ass the toilet paper tears.
Low water pressure maybe? Mines a real cheap one and I’ve never had issues with not being clean after. I do usually get stronger toilet paper, but I only use a roll or two a month. I wouldn’t say it’s life changing, but I do prefer it. Also has saved me a lot on tp
Yes and also mine takes 30+ seconds to properly clean so make sure you take your time.
I like to waggle my butt in the stream to make sure I get everything clean.
You need to use the power washer setting. Takes the paint right off the wall…
Some are better than others in both power and nozzle angle/placement. Sometimes you have to shimmy to get the angle just right if the power is low. It should result in a wipe in which no fecal matter remains, only wetness, if executed properly.
Exactly. There’s a learning curve but once you’ve got it, you dread wipe only bathrooms. Installed a bidet on one of my toilets six months ago and now that’s the only toilet anybody in the house poops in unless it’s already occupied.
“Hey, if some caked-up mud pie got on your face, would you just wipe it off with a dry piece of tissue and call it a day? No! You’d wash it. So why is your butthole any different?” - Detective Allen Gamble, ‘The Other Guys’
My butthole is very different from my face and I hope that is true for everyone else as well
Lip skin is the same as butthole skin
Be kind
Bidet and wipe
Remember you don’t have to clean your whole ass. You just have to clean your ass’s hole.
I wash my bum with liquid soap and my ass smells like strawberries all day. Hell yeah bidets
I’ve brought bidets awesomeness in groups before.
It is immediately apparent who is “in the club” and who is not.
I like the bidet’s we have at home, but I don’t get the ones that are separate from the toilet. Saw this type when visiting San Juan, PR once. Their plumbing system can’t handle toilet paper very well, so it’s all bidets with a stack of washed towels.
Not only do they take up extra space in the bathroom, but are you supposed to waddle over to this thing with a dingleberry hanging out? I don’t get why you’d want that.
The one argument I’ve heard in their favor is from people with vaginas who don’t like the idea of the built-in sprayer catching bits of poop that’ll get in their cootch.
“people with vaginas”, what a world we’re living in
What are you talking about?
I was literally getting my ass sprayed when I opened this meme.
