And I know we’re mostly atheists here, but please keep the theological discussion to a minimum and appreciate the lighthearted hypothetical scenario for what it is.

  • @TootSweet@lemmy.worldEnglish
    45•11 months ago

    “No slavery”, “no genocide”, “no slavery”, “no genocide”, and “seriously, no slavery or genocide”.

    • sylver_dragonEnglish
      30•11 months ago

      Considering that early Jewish writings directly contain laws about the treatment of slaves, “no slavery” was probably not on the list.

      As for Genocide, Yahweh commanded Saul through Samuel:

      And Samuel said to Saul, "The Lord sent me to anoint you to be king over His people, over Israel; and now hearken to the voice of the words of the Lord.
      …
      Now, go, and you shall smite Amalek, and you shall utterly destroy all that is his, and you shall not have pity on him: and you shall slay both man and woman, infant and suckling, ox and sheep, camel and ass.

      And then Yahweh threw a hissy fit when Saul showed some mercy. Turns out that Yahweh was is a dick, according to his own believers’ writings.

      • @Followupquestion@lemm.ee
        11•11 months ago

        So you’re saying the Bible specifically recommends slaying ass?

        “Honey, the Bible says I gotta go slay ass! I know I promised those days were behind me, but God wants me to do it! Completely off topic, how’s your sister? She still single?”

      • @fubo@lemmy.world
        5•11 months ago

        To be fair, Samuel had tried to convince the people of Israel not to do the king thing in the first place. See 1 Samuel 8:10-22.

        And he said, This will be the manner of the king that shall reign over you:

        He will take your sons, and appoint them for himself, for his chariots, and to be his horsemen; and some shall run before his chariots. […] And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cooks, and to be bakers.

        And he will take your fields, and your vineyards, and your oliveyards, even the best of them, and give them to his servants. And he will take the tenth of your seed, and of your vineyards, and give to his officers, and to his servants. And he will take your menservants, and your maidservants, and your goodliest young men, and your asses, and put them to his work. He will take the tenth of your sheep: and ye shall be his servants.

        And ye shall cry out in that day because of your king which ye shall have chosen you; and the Lord will not hear you in that day.

        Nevertheless the people refused to obey the voice of Samuel; and they said, Nay; but we will have a king over us; that we also may be like all the nations; and that our king may judge us, and go out before us, and fight our battles.

        • @davidgro@lemmy.world
          1•4 months ago

          Only 10% taxes?
          Doesn’t sound like such a bad deal maybe.

          Anyway, at least some of the USA founding fathers were just as down on the idea of political parties as Samuel was on kings here. I think they were right.

      • @soviettaters@lemm.ee
        4•11 months ago

        Slavery most definitely is allowed by the Jewish and Christian God. Genocide is much trickier, as there is still debate about certain wording and whether or not genocide actually happened at the time. Overall, the consensus is that genocide is bad at current times either because all genocide is bad or because God does not condone current genocides.

        Source: I’m Christian

      • @Doorbook@lemmy.world
        3•11 months ago

        “PM Netanyahu invokes ‘Amalek’ theory to justify Gaza killings.”

        He actually quoted this a few weeks back…

      • TacoButtPlugEnglish
        2•11 months ago

        I spent an evening doing keyword searches in all the major holy texts one night just to gauge how violent they are and was definitely just thoroughly disgusted with all of them. I missed this excerpt, though. I guess I didn’t think about searching the word “smite”. Anyway… ugh.

        Honestly, screw all religion. It’s a nice thought to have a belief system of origin but humans are so stupidly violent and manipulative by nature that there’s no way to create something useful and wholesome. They all condone the whole “kill those you disagree with” bullshit, amongst other awful isms. So far, Sikhism is the least violent and sexist I can find of any religion.

    • SanguinePar
      6•11 months ago

      “seriously, no slavery or genocide”

      “So, what God is really saying is that it’s ok if we do BOTH…”