• @Kimdracula@sh.itjust.works
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    3 months ago

    There’s nothing that I can do about it dude. Is my reality and my soul, my nature. You just exist, i won’t change myself into something I don’t wanna be.

    • @Feathercrown@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      You don’t want to be happy?

      I have some advice for you, that I hope you can apply (if not-- oh well, advice is cheap). There are no hard rules to life. There is no way that men or women (or others) must be, simply because they are. There is no “average woman”. There is no such thing as being bound to one purpose, or one fate. Your life is the sum of your choices and the experiences that result from them; no more, no less. And if you’re in an environment (IRL or online) where this seems to be wrong-- everyone thinks in a way that you disagree with, or agrees that change or exception are not possible-- change your environment. Your brain is a machine that will offload any choices it can make whenever possible to be more efficient. Your environment is a powerful shortcut. Make sure that it’s working in your favor. I wish you luck in changing your fate.

      • @Kimdracula@sh.itjust.works
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        3 months ago

        Changing your environment is a middle class luxury, do you think poor people have the luxury of “start over again” moving and stuff, that bs is from your Hollywood movies.

        I live with my family in a middle size apartment ffs. There’s no start over. There’s no ✨ change your environment ✨ I’m unemployed and poor. And that won’t change even if I had a job.

        • @Feathercrown@lemmy.world
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          23 months ago

          It would certainly help. “Change your environment” doesn’t necessarily mean “move”. Getting a job counts. Surrounding yourself with people who have healthy thought patterns counts. Redecorating your room counts.

          • @Kimdracula@sh.itjust.works
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            -23 months ago

            Healthy thoughts? So apparently I’m supposed to surround myself with gay people or something? Because everyone screws everyone. I don’t see that as unhealthy, is just reality

            • @Feathercrown@lemmy.world
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              3 months ago

              I haven’t been screwed over by someone in literal years, because I surround myself with people who don’t do that. Again, if you think “everyone” does something, that’s likely not true; it’s only a reflection of the people you see daily. “It’s just reality” is a thought-terminating cliche that is preventing you from improving your environment.

                • @Feathercrown@lemmy.world
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                  23 months ago

                  I’d argue my tone has been at least 50% technical rather than pure guru nonsense, but fine, how about I switch to something more direct. Get off your ass and stop complaining about your life without making any effort to fix it. You want to be happy? You want the people that you know to treat you with respect? Drop the ones who don’t, and find ones who do! I’m not lying, I’m not gaslighting, and I’m not trying to mislead you. What possible incentive would I have to do that? Do you think everyone goes around being miserable 100% of the time? No, because we have chosen to identify and fix the problems in our lives (internal and external– that’s why I keep bringing up environments), so that we can enjoy the lives we’re making. You owe it to yourself to do the same.

                  Obviously I don’t know much about your life, that’s why I’m trying to get you to understand how to fix it yourself. I can’t do shit, I’m just trying to motivate you to do something. If you do have someone in your life that you value and trust, you should ask them for advice, but until you do, this is the best you’re gonna get.