Couch Fucker wears a beard because he’s a piss baby. He thinks that it makes him look more manly than the pudge does.
I wear a beard for 2 reasons. 1. I am lazy. 2. I saw Jeremiah Johnson as a kid and that big bushy grizzly adams beard was the coolest shit ever.
We are not the same.
I wear a beard because my spine tried to kill me in 2008 and I couldn’t stand up long enough to shave.
I keep the beard because I fucking earned it.
It’s a shitty beard… and real men don’t base their worth off beards anyhow.
I base my worth (partially) off the fact that at a sci-fi convention I once had my hair braided into my side burns. That’s a fucking badass memory.
Growing my beard now. Wonder how long until I can braid my hair into it…
I will warn you that it doesn’t quite work how you’d think… I’d say I have a beard thick enough to avoid shaming a dwarf - but when my hair was braided in it was pretty fine and tight and looked more elven.
OK good
He looks way better with the beard than without.
But it’s as patchy as mine is.
Granted he’s a pretty shitty face…
what it means to be a man
We must be swift as the coursing river, with all the force of a great typhoon, with all the strength of a raging fire, mysterious as the dark side of the moon.
Kinda mean to call Usha Vance names…
Idk, I wear a short beard because I think I look better with one than without one. To wear your facial hair a certain way for any other reason is just wild to me.
I wear mine when I can’t be bothered to take the time to shave it off. Is that wild to you?
Literally what wild means.
Well I feel like that’s not an active decision. I get procrastination. I can let that one slide.
I have a crappy beard, but at least it doesn’t make me look like a hamster like Vance’s does.
Lmao as a beard-haver myself: are the authors really encouraging us to take notes from that idiot heterosectional on literally anything? Because my reaction to basically anything that chucklefuck does is to point and laugh, regardless of the topic or context. It’s one of the most effective nonviolent tactics against fascists, after all.
TLDR:
While Vance has portrayed himself as a working man’s candidate, his selective criticism of corporate power is at best a secondary act in a more encompassing tirade against 21st-century modernity, whose primary sin has been to dismantle nuclear families supported by a child-rearing woman and make men miserable in the process. In that sense, Vance’s beard meets the moment of his party – one that, like some of its 16th century forebears, seeks to project toughness, aggression and grievance in an age where Republicans perceive masculinity as an endangered value. It doesn’t matter that Vance is friends with largely beardless Silicon Valley billionaires or provided legal representation to big pharmaceutical companies that fueled much of the opioid crisis that Republicans blame on immigrants – his performance has persuaded his supporters that he is the rugged everyman, and the beard is one of his most important props.
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