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🍹Early to RISA 🧉M to Greentext@sh.itjust.works • 11 days ago

Anon is a fighter

sh.itjust.works

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Anon is a fighter

sh.itjust.works

🍹Early to RISA 🧉M to Greentext@sh.itjust.works • 11 days ago
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  • @RvTV95XBeo@sh.itjust.works
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    16•11 days ago

    One punch from my scrawny nerd warrior arms and that fucker would shrug then donkey kick me half way across the fucking Serengeti.

    • @FooBarrington@lemmy.world
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      0•11 days ago

      No, you’re approaching this the wrong way. You run towards it at full speed, then get a 45° angle and jump. While doing so, you grab their neck like a pole, and use the force to hoist yourself upon their back.

      You either already killed them with this move, or you’re now on their back and holding their throat. There’s nothing a giraffe can do to throw you down or attack you now. You can just choke, and choke, and keep choking it until it falls to its knees.

      • @RvTV95XBeo@sh.itjust.works
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        10•11 days ago

        You lost me at “run”. Can I bring my inhaler or does that count as a tool?

        • @FooBarrington@lemmy.world
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          -4•
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          11 days ago

          Oh, you’re American? I guess you could drive your scooter up specifically designed ramp to reach their back. Though I feel most animals wouldn’t stand a chance against you guys on their back.

      • @MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml
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        6•
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        10 days ago

        Their neck starts at 3 meter height tho.

        • @FooBarrington@lemmy.world
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          2•10 days ago

          Not the necks of teenage giraffes!

      • @itslilith@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        5•11 days ago

        It can roll over. Do you like your legs? Besides, unless you’re a lion, good luck jumping up there. And even then, you’re not choking a giraffe out. Their neck is basically only muscle.

        • @FooBarrington@lemmy.world
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          2•11 days ago

          Am I stupid, or did I miss the “rolling over”? I just saw the giraffe lady down while saying “choke me harder daddy”

          • @itslilith@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            4•11 days ago

            Are you a 150kg murder machine with claws that can high jump several times it’s size? Even then, the lion got thrown off not once, but twice. Thinking you could fight a giraffe and win is dellusional

            • @somethingsnappy@lemmy.world
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              3•11 days ago

              Lions cannot jump several times their height. They can leap forward several times their height and length. Not straight up. https://images.app.goo.gl/NhdZC

              • @FooBarrington@lemmy.world
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                3•11 days ago

            • @FooBarrington@lemmy.world
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              1•11 days ago

              No, I lost some weight, so not quite. What lions have in claw strength, I however have in elbow strength!

          • @Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world
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            11 days ago

            I just saw the giraffe lady

            Aww, I must have missed her.

            • @FooBarrington@lemmy.world
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              2•11 days ago

              That’s a typo I’ll gladly keep!

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