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Mannivu to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish • 2 years ago

Italian man crushed to death by thousands of falling cheese wheels

ground.news

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  • cross-posted to:
  • news@beehaw.org
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Italian man crushed to death by thousands of falling cheese wheels

ground.news

Mannivu to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish • 2 years ago
message-square
20
fedilink
  • cross-posted to:
  • news@beehaw.org
An Italian man has been crushed to death under thousands of vast wheels of a parmesan-style hard cheese, which weigh about 40kg each, firefighters have said.
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  • slazer2au
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    34•2 years ago

    Making Sheogorath proud.

    • @UntouchedWagons@lemmy.ca
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      5•2 years ago

      It just works.

  • @mean_bean279@lemmy.world
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    34•2 years ago

    I just assumed this was how Italians did capital punishment.

    • Semi-Hemi-Demigod
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      12•2 years ago

      You get a choice: Death by cheese, death by pasta, or death by marinara

      • rockerface 🇺🇦
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        4•2 years ago

        Is death by pasta being hanged?

        • Semi-Hemi-Demigod
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          5•2 years ago

          Nah, you’re whipped to death a cat o’ nine tails made of cooked spaghetti

          • @TheDoctorDonna@lemmy.world
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            3•2 years ago

            Half cooked spaghetti would be more durable and effective.

            • @Samwizegamgi42@lemmy.world
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              13•2 years ago

              Al dente’s inferno

              • @isame@lemm.ee
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                2•2 years ago

                You got a genuine chuckle out of me. Life’s been a bit unkind lately, so thank you.

  • @Axiochus@lemmy.world
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    15•2 years ago

    I wonder what the protocol is for the cheese. Like, how much do you salvage? You’ll obviously want to save as much as possible without grossing out customers. Maybe you let the family eat the cheese most responsible for the death, as a kind of scapecheese? Or you do a reverse firing squad kind of deal where the cheeses are cleaned and randomized to share the blame.

  • @gibmiser@lemmy.world
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    9•2 years ago

    He should have just kept opening his inventory to eat them as the fell. What a noob.

  • @OrnatePotato@feddit.uk
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    6•2 years ago

    He knew the risks.

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆
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    6•2 years ago

    Dovahkin, on a nearby mountain top: “Uh oh! Overencumbered. Hmmm… I don’t think I need all these wheels of cheese now that I have 30 million health potions. Off you go!”

    Meanwhile

    Italian man: “I sure hope I don’t get crushed under the weight of thousands of falling cheese wheels, today.”

  • @pedz@lemmy.ca
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    6•2 years ago

    As much as this is tragic, I can’t help but think about that episode of TNG when Worf got hit by a falling barrel and nearly died.

    https://media.tenor.com/XbPBguZizYkAAAAd/worf-the-next-generation.gif

  • GratefullyGodless
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    5•2 years ago

    What a cheesy way to die.

    • Jay
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      2•2 years ago

      Not very gouda.

  • @6mementomori@lemmy.world
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    3•2 years ago

    I can’t even imagine what your last sight would be like

  • Rhaedas
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    3•2 years ago

    “Do you think they got a new shipment of cheese wheels in the corner market today?”

    “Look. This is every cheese wheel in the game.”

    “Townton is so beautiful this time of day.”

    insane laugh

    /haver

  • donuts
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    3•2 years ago

    Mama mia.

  • @afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world
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    2•2 years ago

    The fate of one of the many unnamed NPC residents of Townton

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